Hello big world

I decided to take a few minutes this weekend for an impromptu photo shoot. Trevor is getting bigger and stronger every day and has a hardy appetite. He's a momma's boy, but that's just fine with me.

And then there were 4...

Trevor
7 lbs 10 oz
Born on Tuesday, October 18th at 4:06pm

"I love thee to the depth and breadth and height my soul can reach." Elizabeth Barrett Browning

End of Summer at the new house

Maddox has adjusted quickly to the new house. It took a few days to get organized and I wish I had my camera to snap some photos, like when Maddox found a step ladder to pull into the kitchen and eat his breakfast cereal.

I'm sure it helps that we have been resurrecting his old toys to his delight, the ones that have been boxed up for half the week that he sadly watched disappear at the old house. And with more room to play and new places to explore, he's quite happy.

Yesterday we went outside for an impromptu photo shoot. Here is Maddox posing (yes, definitely POSING and saying "cheese") around the yard.

Baby room preview: Before and after makeover

We finished the baby room!

Here's a before and after of the new room for our little one. I love how it turned out, especially since I got everything to put it together before we moved in so it was the first time to see how it would look.

Here's the room before...

And here is what it looks like now...

I made the mobile, quilt, and rug which I think gives it a more personal touch.

It's good to be settling in and making the house our own.

Moving in and 35 weeks



We finally made the big move. At the last possible moment housing came through and I joined the hubby in Knoxville.

He happened to have inventory (a once a year event) that weekend so I managed the house during the movers coming and delivery our boxes. Lots of cleaning, little sleep, and two long days later the pets, Maddox, and I arrived. By Monday, we were moving in and painting.

It's been a whirlwind of unpacking, prepping, and preparing for baby #2. I finally hit my point of exhaustion yesterday but picked back up by this afternoon to work on refinishing our entry way wood floor and unpacking most of the garage.

I hate boxes. I hate disorganization. I hate not having the house set up. I want to focus on decorating and not unwrapping individual packed items.

By now, the little one has dropped and is sitting comfortably on my bladder and pelvis-- not so comfortably for me. It's coming down to the wire and seeing the crib all set up made it all very real, more real than it's been so far.

Is there really going to be a baby sleeping in that room? Are we really doing this again? It seems so long ago that we were at that point with Maddox.

That's all for now, but I also wanted to share this shot of Maddox getting curious while I was trying to photograph "the bump." Big brother is already trying to steal the show!



Toddlers love velcro blocks

This week I came across an idea for putting velcro on building blocks from Chasing Cheerios. I'm always looking for ways to occupy my busy toddler and blocks are one of his favorite things to play with.

Not only does the velcro allow him to build in new dimensions, but you can always add new shapes to keep their creativity flowing.

When I couldn't find regular building blocks at the craft store, I picked up plain wood square blocks and a bag of wooden spools for $2 each. I then chose red and blue velcro. A small glue gun gave the velcro the sticking power to resist the pull of the velcro, but if you try it make sure the corners are well glued to keep them stuck on tight. A few came loose and needed to be re-glued more securely.

As mothers know, toys like blocks end up scattered all over the room and always end up underfoot. So I found the perfect storage solution with a cute canister on clearance. My little one loves taking the lid on and off and has done a great job keeping his new block set picked up.

Actually, he loves the blocks and canister so much that he won't let me touch them. When I asked if I could see them, Maddox stated very matter-of-factly "No, my blocks!"

"His" blocks were even tucked securely under his arm tonight while watching his Veggie Tales movie (so mom wouldn't put them somewhere) and I'm sure would have gone to bed with him had I allowed it.

My next project is almost done and will be for the baby. I won't tell you what it is yet, but will give you a peek at the great fabrics I'm using.

July 4th recipes for Red, White, and Blue fun

Happy 4th of July readers!

It's time again for barbecues, fireworks, and family get-togethers. Pack up the picnic gear, heat up the grill, (if you're here in the South be sure to slather on the insect repellent), and get ready to enjoy the best summer holiday. It's always a great opportunity to sample some of the fresh local produce picked at the peak of ripeness so be sure to visit your local farmers market or vegetable stand!

If you're a busy momma, then chances are you're still trying to pull it all together for tonight. (Don't worry, I fall into this category so no judgement here.) But here are a few of our family's favorite last-minute holiday recipes.

Fresh local fruit

Watermelon never tasted better than now! Slice up a sweet red melon and buy extras for watermelon eating contests-- it's a menu item and party game all in one.

Other tasty fruits include blueberries and strawberries. Walmart has strawberries for only $.98 per container so stock up! (We sliced six cartons and put them in freezer bags to enjoy later this winter.) We enjoy serving our berries with fresh whipped cream. The more talented mommies can make an American flag out of fruit-topped fresh whip.

Corn-on-the-grill

There are a few ways to grill corn. One favorite is to husk the heads and place them in tin foil with butter, salt, and pepper. Cover and place on grill until tender crisp. The second way is to keep the corn in the loosened husk and grill on a rack or to the side of the coals, turning often until tender crisp.

July 4th pudding cookies

A different take on pudding is to make festive cookie. Start by mixing up a standard vanilla (or bananna) pudding recipe. Add red or blue food coloring and spread between two Vanilla cookies. Refrigerate until ready to serve.

Juciest burgers ever!

Or... at least that's what the recipe says. This year I'm trying a recipe for the "juciest" grilled burgers from All Recipies.com. The recipe calls for 2lbs ground beef, 1 beaten egg, 3/4 cup dry bread crumbs (I reduced this to about 1/2 cup), 3 Tbs milk, 2 Tbs Worcestershire sauce, 1/8 tsp cayenne pepper, and 2 cloves minced garlic. Mix together and form into patties before grilling.

The verdict has not come in yet on these, but I love that this site allows other cooks to leave feedback and rate the recipe.

Bon apetit

So I've decided...

Yes. I've decided that Maddox is allowed to grow up: He can make friends, experience life, travel far and wide, expand his mind and his interests, and do everything his heart desires.

He just can never leave. I've decided it's not allowed.

Because I wouln't get "mommy time," Maddox hugs and kisses, or goodnight 'I love you's.' And those are my favorite parts of the day.

A boy, a dog, and a hot day

... Some our favorite reasons to love summer.

Poo Patrol-- Reporting for duty

Lately my life has been full of poo-- No joke!

Here, let me explain.

The last few weeks it seems stinkiness has been placed in my path from all directions. First, both my dogs went through separate bouts of nighttime horror that left an awful mess for me to find and clean in the morning. I have no idea what set off their systems nearly simultaneously, but it wasn't pretty.

Then there is my toddler who refuses to do anything in the bathroom other than play, play, and sing. And while I'm wise enough to hold off on cloth diapers until the morning poo duty is done, he has recently begun (it seems) waiting for the cloth to hit his bottom before making a deposit. Often, just moments after being released from the changing table.

Whyyyy???

The most recent addition to my constant clean up has been with our foster dog, Lotus. All has gone remarkably well with her-- that is until this week. All thankfulness that she is housebroken has now been doused. Following her spay surgery she has been a constant mess of upset stomachs and backward explosions. And thanks to daily rainstorms, I've been forced to coop her up in the kennel for the safety of our rugs. But even the few times I have whisked her outdoors, she refuses to stay off the deck which means I still have a mess on my hands.

Sigh

Who knew motherhood held so much... poo? It begins in infancy with leaky diapers and a shower of sprinkles every now and then, continues for the next few years with various degrees of messiness, and culminates with an attempt to potty train which means a wet bed and multiple clothing changes, then rushed searches for the nearest bathroom when they "gotta go" pronto. I've almost become desensitized to poo at this point-- almost.

It's a good thing that "daddy" was given the weak stomach and not I. Mothers need all the strength of stomach and nostrils that they can be given. It's part of the job description that poo, and vomit, and fluids you never imagined dealing with appear on your daily agenda. And on you. And even though I do wish all hands could be on duty right now, it's still nice to know I can handle it on my own if I have to.  

Still, I've been thinking... there has to be an upside in all this. Yes, tomorrow I shall buy stock in Bounty and Lysol anti-bacterial cleaner. I'm sure our house is solelyy responsible for soaring sales.

Learning to jump

... Because that's what trampolines and summer are for

Gone country... at least for a week or two

Eleven plus hours, many sippy cups of juice, and one dog howling later we've arrived on the farm.

Maddox quickly announced his presence by running inside calling for "bampa" and pulling out all the riding toys that were waiting for him. (This included a miniature four-wheeler, a bmx trycicle, and an antique riding tractor that pulls a wagon.)

Life is certainly exciting when you're 2 and have new places to discover and lots of open space to play. 

Rock a bye baby

It may be overdue, but I'm finally out of the woods and (mostly) feeling human again. Plus between managing all aspects of the house, work, a little one, and a physically demanding day every day I just haven't been ready.

So here it goes. (Sorry to those of you who are not getting a personal announcement but I've honestly told hardly anyone.)

Yes, I'm pregnant again. This weekend marks the 18 week check point. Maddox has started to pick out babies in the store and announce to me that he's found "a baby!" Which is good. A few months ago the only babies he recognized had fur and lived in our chinchilla room.

This week I switched to the midwife group that delivered Maddox. It's not that the doctor I have is not a nice lady, but the personal touch and concern with my midwife just doesn't compare. At my last appointment in the new office I finally felt comfortable about maternity care. I tend to freak out aka hyperventilate at doctors offices. So it was a relief-- to me and the poor nurses who have to figure out why my blood pressure is suddenly skyrocketing! (If anyone needs a midwife let me know.)

In two weeks, we'll find out if it's going to be pink or blue. Or rather, who will be sleeping in the green and brown crib sheets!

It's a little overwhealming but I hope to spend some time back with friends and family sometime after delivery.

Here's a photo of 18 weeks... and counting

The joys of toddlerhood and an Easter recap

This Easter, Maddox was old enough to take part in more of the activities and really enjoyed a week of holiday events. It's fun watching him grow and discover.

Early in the week, we met up with friends and dyed eggs at the park. Most of the dye ended up on the kids and on the floor, but they loved dunking them and eating the frosted Easter cookies one mom brought. Here's Maddox with the twins.

Next, we had a weekend Egg hunt at church. Maddox didn't know what to do first-- there was a "sand box" of bird seed to dig in, giant bubbles to blow, a park to play in, a bouncey house, and even a petting zoo complete with lambs, ducks and chicks, dogs, and rabbits.

We hunted eggs together and even stopped long enough to pose for a few photos. After picking up each egg, Maddox would dump out the candy contents to see what he'd gotten. We didn't keep most of the candy (It was taffy and hard candy) but here's a shot of him devouring a bag of fruit chews they also left out for the kids to find.

On Sunday, we hid eggs in the grass and let Maddox run around in search of a half dozen hard boiled ones. (Good thing he's so good at finding them or we'd have no eggs for Easter brunch ; ) After finding each egg, he'd hold it high and show us ANOTHER EGG!

At church on Sunday, they had all the kids go up front with "Jesus" for the final song. And of course, guess whose child was the only one climbing up and down stairs and zooming around the front of the church? Yup, you guessed it.

Of course by the end of the song, he was finally sitting nicely and cried when he had to get off the stairs...

The final verdict? Easter is pretty fun when you're 2. 

Easter bunny or not to bunny this Easter...?

A rescue rabbit, waiting to be adopted.



Today we stopped at our local feed store to look at pet food. We were greeted by the resident duck and overwhealmed by the number of chicks, ducklings, and baby rabbits being sold.

The feed store visit got me wondering... are baby animals really a good Easter addition?

Millions of rabbits (and ducks and chicks) are sold every year during the month of April. Right now, pet stores and feed stores all over the country are preparing by stocking up on baby bunnies for expectant children yet again.

But do bunnies make a good gift?

Cute as a bunny
Baby animals are  adorable, especially furry bunnies with their long ears and twitching noses. And while rabbits can make wonderful pets when spayed and neutered, there are a number of cautions and drawbacks to rabbit ownership.

Rabbit rescues often receive a wave of unwanted rabbits following the Easter holiday. According to The Bunny Rescue of Nashville, "Contrary to Eastertime hype, rabbits and small children aren't a good match. The exuberance of even the gentlest toddler is stressful for the sensitive rabbit. Children like a companion they can hold, and cuddle. That's why stuffed animals are so popular."

Children quickly lose interest in their pet rabbit when the bunny is reluctant to be held and cuddled like a toy. But being picked up is frightening and often uncomfortable to the bunny. Some rabbits end up neglected and forgotten.

Many new owners also don't realize what happens when rabbits mature. Rescuers warn that "If left un-neutered they will chew, spray or dig." Some even become territorial of their cage and will lunge and bite.
Rabbits are certainly not for everyone, so before buying a bunny ask yourself the following questions:

Rabbits are not "low-maintenance" pets. Are you ready to be the main caretaker? (cage cleaning, providing fresh water/hay/pellets/veggies daily, vet visits, exercise out of the cage, etc?)

Are you prepared for a pet that will live 10-15 years?

Rabbits must be neutered or they will mark your house with feces and urine. Are you prepared for this cost? Do you know a rabbit-savvy vet?

Rabbits should live indoors (for many safety reasons), as members of the family. Do you have room for a large cage and space for them to roam?

If after carful consideration you still believe rabbit ownership is the right decision for your family, please think adoption first. Some rescues will make families wait until after Easter to adopt, but there are too many unwanted rabbits waiting to find a new family.

Green thumbs and muddy shoes

They say gardening is good for the soul. Digging in the dirt helps remind us of the good and tangible things in life. In a world run by the button-pushers and electronic messengers, sometimes it just feels good to touch something solid. 

I also think gardening is good for the child in you.

The other day after a heavy rain, I pulled on my heavy boots and took my son outside with seeds and shovels in hand. The dogs danced around us and played in the grass while we looked over our small patch of garden and debated where to plant our peas, zuchinni, cucumbers, tomatoes, and herbs. The sun felt so good after a long winter and wet, chilly start to spring.

We dug and planted for about 30 minutes, which is all a busy toddler can really handle. I carefully pushed seeds into each hole while Maddox drizzled them clumsily, spilling peas into the grass. He loves "helping" and watching his enthusiasm made me smile.

Gardens are wonderful places for children. It's a place of quiet solitude, brooding thoughts, shared times, and simple sucesses. One of the best places to grow up is in a garden where trial and error don't hurt so badly and heavy burdens can be dug deep into the ground and buried for a while.

Maddox might still be too young to remember these early times together. He may not even know that the seeds we planted are now the same peas peeking out of the ground and beginning to wind upwards, gowing and climbing to find the sun.

But what he will remember is that he and mommy were never afraid to get our hands dirty and the mud on our boots is okay, that it was earned together. 

We still haven't quite figured out the Southern growing season, but that's okay to. Last year we happily shared zuchinni muffins, zuchinni lasagna, and even breaded and baked zuchinni fries from monstrous vegetables. But that's not the only reaon why I started the garden. Sometimes the process is more important than the final product. 

Here's a video of Maddox last year helping me "water" the plants.

And just as a side story, I've decided to share an interesting article from the San Francisco Chronicle about a gardener who took over a vacant lot and turned it into a miniature farm. Urban farms are nothing new, but the city now wants the gardener to buy an expensive permit to continue sharing with the community.

Looking at the pains this gardener took to transform the plot of land, I kept thinking what a wonderful learning experience it would be for local children who visit and the benefits they receive being nourished by the fruits of her labor.

What a terrible loss if city regulations brought it all to a sudden halt.

Of dogs and children

The Three Amigos

As long as they know who's really in charge!

My pregnancy and The evolution of mother's dreams

This week Maddox and I visited the Jones family who recently welcomed a baby boy into their family. It's been joyful to see the couple anxiously anticipating their son's arrival, preparing the baby room, and going through all the happy moments leading to the grand finale. Watching mother and child relaxing together on a Friday afternoon made everything seem so right.

It also brought back certain points in time for me. (Whose own son, I will mention, was reluctant to go inside and then decided to be shy and stand in the corner almost the entirety of our visit! Understand readers, that this is despite the fact that Heather has kept him overnight on more than one occassion and he always cries when he has to go home.)

I would like to be able to relate to those who had such a pregnancy, but mine was full of stress and worry throughout the entire 9 months. Thankfully, everything physically went smoothly but nothing else seemed to come easily.

The announcement of Maddox's presence came at what I believed was the worst possible time. I was only days from moving to Dallas and had a lot of plans forming for work and opportunities that did not include maternity leave. On top of this were other unanswered questions like Do the father and I stay together? Should I move or stay? Where will we get the money for a baby? How long will I have insurance? (The answer to this was that I had coverage until 6 months into the pregnancy, which at that point my employer dropped everyone's insurance and I was forced to apply for state coverage-- twice actually, but we will get to that later.)

Soon after the news that a baby was in our future, I became an emotional, dry-heaving, insomnia-at-night-and -napping-during-the-day, and hormonal mess.

At seven months, we moved to a brand new city. This was a blessing and a lot to handle in the last trimester. My only memories are 1. Packing the moving truck by myself since our friends were working and my significant other wouldn't be back in town until midnight (we had to hit the road around 7am the next morning) and 2. A very long drive with a rediculous number of bathroom stops.

Upon arriving in Nashville, I had to re-apply for insurance coverage. The process in Oklahoma was simple-- bring in a few pay stubs and various information forms to be approved on the spot. But in Nashville, which was also in the middle of a job market crisis that drove hundreds to apply for state benefits, it was not so simple. On a Monday, I went to the office between 6 and 7am to wait for the doors to open at 8. Everyone who hoped to MAKE AN APPOINTMENT was there lined up in an endless stream of people. I was too late and was dismissed that day. Two days later, I had to return at 5:30 am (mind you I was still having insomnia and often did not fall asleep until 8am so this was completely exhausting) and by 10 am I received an appointment to meet with someone who would review my eligibility. Later that afternoon I met with a counselor who filled out some forms for me and submitted my application.

Then I waited... and waited... and waited...

By month 9, I called the office every day asking where my approval and insurance cards were. "We're sorry," they'd say. "We're just very backed up right now. I'm sure they will be there soon." I finally hit my limit and in an exasperated moment told the telephone operator that if I didn't get my card I would be having the baby in my bathroom and NOT be delivered in a hospital where they expected me to hope insurance would pick up the bill later. My card arrived the next week.

In our first-time-parent preparedness, we did not do lamaze classes. We did not read any books (although I did read a very good book written by a midwife whose name I can't recall). We did not have a "birth plan." We did not have a hospital picked out. We did not have a delivery doctor (the clinic I was going to did not do deliveries, only pre-natal care). Most of our baby clothes were donated by a nice family that didn't need them. It all seemed like such a mess.

One week before juniors big arrival, I decided to walk through Vanderbilt hospital and spoke to a kind receptionist. I told her of my hesitation about hospitals and doctors and how I would like to possibly deliver at home but the father flatly refused that option. She suggested a midwife group that delivered at Vanderbilt and I made an appointment (not knowing that this far along most doctors will not begin seeing a new patient).

There was only time for one office visit (after a long debate about whether or not they would take me on) that was cut short due to overscheduling that day. They took my blood pressure and tried to gather my medical history, then sent me out the door. Less than a week later they delivered my child. 

Anxiety? Yes, let's say there was just a little!

My water broke on a Friday around 6pm at a small shopping mart by our apartment. I was in the middle of making dinner and had run to the store to get salad ingredients. On my way to the check-out counter I felt a slight wetness. Hmmm... then a little more... time to get home. Just as I handed my credit card to the checker there was a gush, gush, SPLASH! My water erupted and began dousing my legging-covered legs in an embrassing torrent. I raced out of the store, groceries in hand, and drove home.

Three clothing changes later I realized there was nothing I could do but put on a dress and grab a towel. Hastily I packed a bag for the hospital, not really knowing what to bring but remarkably doing a decent job. I texted dad who was still at work who texted back "Are you sure your water broke??" Ummm.. yes. Or I have major bladder issues that defy physical limitations.

I made him a quick salad and then drove to pick him up. To my dismay, every guy at work came outside to satisfy their curiosity about what a woman in labor looked like. I wasn't amused and refused to get out of the drivers seat with my giant towel tucked in place. I handed dad his salad and drove us to the hospital. (Well, kind of. The contractions were causing me to get light-headed and I ended up getting lost and turning a 30 minute drive to a one hour drive in rush hour traffic.)

23 hours later, Maddox was born.

I would like to say I was in love from the moment I saw him, but that would be a lie. I was certainly in awe, but also very surprised by the whole thing. How did the moving, growing bump I'd been carrying for so long and over so many miles suddenly turn into a tiny human? By the next day, we were happily bonded and still share a special closeness that is stronger than any other.

Children were nothing new to me, but a newborn was an entirely different responsiblity. I loved taking him with me and taking care of his needs, but also couldn't wait for him to grow up. His fragileness scared me. His helplessness made me rush home after leaving him home with dad for only 45 minutes. I slept restlessly, listening to each sound he made and to make sure he was breathing. I looked forward to "bigger."

Even more than his dad, I looked forward to discovering the world together, to play in the fall leaves, run around the house in a game of tag, read books together, and even fill a companionship that I yearned for. I couln't wait to hear him call me by name, tell me what he was thinking, see who he would look like, what color eyes he would have, and what kind of interests he'd develop.

Looking back, both moments in time were equally precious. Infancy has a sense of innocent sweetness that eventually changes. Not that children aren't sweet, but babies don't even know how to be naughty or disobey. They just do what they do and are...

Another thing I've learned is that as children get older, your role changes. Things like discipline, teaching good habits, showing a good example, and guiding makes your job more complicated. It takes more planning and consistency.

And yes, I do love the toddler stage.. most of the time.. but there are also times when I fail to enjoy THESE moments because THESE moments also completely wear a mother out.

It's funny how your hopes and dreams evolve over time. Childhood is a time for dreams, the making of theirs and the evolution of your own.

It's a fast-paced life... when you're 2

Have I mentioned that this boy has no less than four cell phones? A future business man, no doubt.